Weight Gain & Getting Un-Comfy

Hi friends, it's been a hot minute since I last wrote. It has been a while since I’ve actually had the time to sit down and convey my thoughts properly without feeling sidetracked. I want to touch base on a topic that tends to trigger fear and discomfort (especially for young girls and women), myself included.  Any guesses? If you haven’t already gathered from the title, we are going to discuss weight gain and the uncomfortable moments that will most likely come along with it. PSA: This post is going to be brutally honest and if you feel like this may trigger you in any way, shape, or form, I would recommend that you don’t continue reading. However, if you are willingly trying to gain weight and need that extra push or guidance, I’ve got you. I’ve been in your position believe it or not (see the images below if you don’t believe me). YOU CAN overcome any fears you may have if you willingly put in the effort, stay consistent, believe in yourself, and have faith in your abilities. You are so much stronger than you think. Let’s get to it.

First and foremost, what’s stopping you? Why is weight gain scary or uncomfortable for you personally? Sit down and really think about it. Think long and hard. Are your thoughts rational? Are your thoughts coming from a place of hatred or a place of love? Every single decision you make should come from a place of love or wanting to better yourself in a positive way. If you fear weight gain because you are stuck in a trap of needing/wanting to have this “ideal body,” to be “skinny”, I don’t know and quite frankly I don’t care what the reasoning is. If it affects you, your body, overall health, mental health, or emotional being in any way then IT IS NOT RATIONAL. You need to let those thoughts go. When those thoughts arise, you need to face them, HEAD ON. You need to tell yourself that YOU ARE ENOUGH no matter your size. It will take time and it will not come easy. Nothing good is ever going to come easy, and if you haven’t figured that out yet, well SPOILER ALERT I guess. I think most of you understand life isn’t easy though or you probably wouldn’t be reading this. It will get easier with time though. If you continuously face those irrational or uncomfortable thoughts, you will find a way to fight them consistently so that eventually they only happen every so often. That is the long-term goal. For now, you are going have to fight. You are going to have to fight like hell.

If you are reading this there is a pretty good chance you are struggling with something. If not weight gain, then something else. Maybe you have tried on your own to fight this fear. Maybe, you have told yourself countless times you were enough, but never fully believed it. Maybe you have tried to gain weight and got to a point of discomfort, so you quit and you let that fear win. Let me tell you something. YOU ARE NOT QUITTING THIS TIME. I will not allow it. You are not going to let yourself quit. Why? Because, you DESERVE to feel alive. You deserve happiness. You deserve to become your best self and live the most positive and uplifting life possible. You are going to repeat after me. Ready? I am ENOUGH. I am CAPABLE. I am STRONG. I will PUT MYSELF FIRST. I will do what it takes to get where I want to be, for ME, and no one else. This message pertains to anyone who may be avoiding something due to fear.

Now that we have given ourselves a little tough love, what’s next? You are going to face your fears and fight them. You are going to stop wishing and start doing. You are going to stop convincing yourself that you are done. You are going to stop saying that you can’t keep going. You are going to stop making excuses for why you can’t put on the weight, and why you can’t push past the un-comfy. You are going to release that sense of fear, once and for all. You are going to surround yourself with positive people. You need people who encourage you, and people who support you no matter what. You need to end the toxic relationships and friendships. They serve NO positive purpose. If someone makes you feel uncomfortable, unworthy, or simply brings no positive value to your life, it is time to say goodbye. It is time to let go. It is time to move on. Harsh? No. Why? You deserve more. You deserve to feel like a fucking ray of sunshine. You deserve to wake up every day surrounded by people who impact you in a positive way and add value to your life. You do not deserve to be mistreated. You do not deserve to feel discouraged or miserable. You deserve to be YOU. You deserve to be happy.

FOOD IS FUEL. FOOD IS FUEL. FOOD IS FUEL. I can preach this to you all damn day long. I can tell you to eat. I can tell you that you aren’t going to gain a million pounds. Will you believe me? Probably not. If you aren’t willing to face your fears and get un-comfy then things won’t change. Fats don’t make you fat. Carbs before bad don’t make you fat, they won’t kill you. Bagels are not the devil. Pizza is okay. You don’t have to go to unnecessary measures and follow crazy diets. All foods are okay. Food is meant to be enjoyed, but food is also crucial to your health. It is what allows you to go about your daily activities, it is what fuels you, it fuels your brain, your workouts, and it is necessary for survival. Let the fear go. You are going to have to eat A LOT, and I mean it when I say this. You will have to eat a F****** lot if you want to put on muscle mass whether you are underweight, just trying to put on added size, etc. Building muscle and gaining weight is hard. It is just as hard as trying to lose weight. It is a goal. It takes time, especially if you want to do it correctly. Moral of the story, FOOD IS FUEL. You can’t fear it. Maybe you think you are eating a lot of food? Sometimes it may feel like that, but you’d be surprised. A lot of people are under-eating and they don’t even realize it. Step back and be honest with yourself. You need to hold yourself accountable or find someone else to hold you accountable. I highly encourage finding someone you can hold yourself accountable to. Why? That is one more person telling you that you can’t quit and that you aren’t allowed to give up.

This brings me to my next point. Let someone in. Talk to someone. Ask for help. Don’t be afraid to discuss what is going on or vent to someone. If you are fighting a million thoughts and you don’t know what to do or how to cope, get it off your chest. Don’t shut people out and don’t be afraid to sit down and just let it all out. Have a good cry if you need to. It’s probably not the first time, and it probably won’t be the last. We are allowed to feel these emotions. You are allowed to feel uncomfortable and scared, but you aren’t allowed to give up. Cry it out, wipe your tears, and tell yourself that you are strong as shit. Tell yourself you are not backing down. Say it loud and proud. I don’t care what you have to do, but don’t give up now. There’s no quitting. Remember? Good.

Fat gain? Yeah, you’ll probably gain a little. Big deal? NOPE. You will survive. With any sort of weight gain, you will probably become uncomfortable at some point. That’s inevitable. You will be okay. Did you know that “fat” is extremely crucial to a woman’s health? Did you know that being at unhealthy body fat percentages, yo-yo dieting, restricting, etc. can set you up for lifelong problems and health issues? No? I am not trying to scare you, but I am trying give you the tough love you need right now. It is important you understand FAT IS NOT BAD. Fat doesn’t mean jack shit. Fat is fat. Stop looking at yourself in the mirror. Put away the scale. Let that shit go. It doesn’t matter. Wake up every day and focus on how you feel. Focus on your strength, your mood, your motivation, your mind, your emotions, etc. FOCUS ON THE IMPORTANT STUFF. Focus on life around you. There is so much more to life than your body and your overall appearance. This world is fucking beautiful. Don’t miss out on it because you are so stuck chasing this picture-perfect image of yourself. If you hate what you are doing, what is the point? Really? Think about it. If you are miserable, what good comes out of it? Still thinking? Another spoiler, nothing good will come and you will never feel fulfilled or fully satisfied. There I said it. Someone needs to. You need to hear the reality of this. Let the bullshit standards go and be free. LIVE. Truly let that stuff go and you will begin to thrive like no other. Live your life for YOU.

Man, I could go on for decades. It hurts my heart and seriously tears me apart when I hear people talking about how much they hate themselves, how terrified they are, how they can’t do something, and how they just want to give up because they feel so lost and hopeless. You don’t need to feel that way forever. Nothing is ever permanent. You have the power to create change. You have the power to better yourself each and every day. Whether you want to take action or take the necessary steps is up to YOU. You are the only one that can push yourself to the finish line. You are the only one that continuously fight for you. I can tell you not to quit all you want, but if you don’t have the willpower or mentality to keep going, you won’t. I hope you keep going. I hope you keep fighting. I hope this gave you the tough love you needed to fight like hell. I want you to thrive. I want you to experience this beautiful life. I want you to understand that your body is a temple and it deserves to be cared for and nourished. Your body is so incredibly unique and special. You are so incredibly unique and special. Your body is not you. You are not your body. You are beautiful no matter your size, shape, or decisions. You can always work to be who you want to be. Every day is a chance to work on yourself. Bad day today? It doesn’t have to be tomorrow. Progress is not linear. There will be good days, bad days, in between days. Through all of those days, you will unleash your true strength. You will learn more about yourself and you will realize how freaking incredible you are. Never forget how amazing you are. Never sell yourself short. You are imperfect. I am imperfect. We are all imperfectly perfect. I am so proud of you. You should be proud of you too. I will leave you with a few last words. You are strong. You are enough. You will be okay. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, maybe not next week, but you will find peace and stillness eventually. Everything takes time. Keep fighting. Do not give up and never stop believing in yourself. Your mindset is everything. It will be worth it, I promise.

Please feel free to reach out anytime. Need a friend? I've got you. Need some more tough love? I'm here for it. Need to chat or some advice? HMU. I am always here for you sweet friends. Don't forget it. <3

Love always, 

Mik